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221B week, Day 8: Oh My God!

BBC Sherlock metafic

Rating 12 (minor character death)

Summary: In a recent comment, I compiled a list of 221B closing words I'd used. Which was bound to lead to my imagination taking an even more bizarre turn....

A sequel to Death of a Fanatic. However this story does not make any more sense if you read that first.




Mary Sutherland was dead: to begin with. There was no doubt whatever about that.

"Yes, there is," Lestrade protested. "She was that barking mad RPF writer, wasn't she? She died of an aneurism in London in January. How the fuck can she now have died in June on Dartmoor?"

"Oh, we know that bit, sir," Sally replied. "She didn't technically die on that fangirl outing, after all. Apparently, she accepted a drink from some Italian friar she met that made her seem to be dead, and then woke up forty-two hours later on a mortuary slab. Gave Molly Hooper a hell of a fright, I gather."

"That sort of thing doesn't happen in real life," said Lestrade.

"Sounds a bit dull," said an irritatingly familiar voice behind him. "This, however, is not. I sent John down to Devon with instructions to report back. Here are his pictures of the scene."

Lestrade stared at the phone screen, and the tall brown-haired woman sprawled lifeless on the ground. "Moriarty's work?" he enquired. It normally was.

"You idiot," Sherlock replied. "Look over there, at that spot near the woman's head. Can't you see the footprints?"

"Footprints? Those look...they look like rabbit tracks, except ten times larger."

"Serves Ms Sutherland right," said Sherlock cheerfully. "She's been mauled to death by a gigantic plot bunny."

Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
fengirl88
Jun. 19th, 2011 09:47 pm (UTC)
I love your Sherlock metafic! also the use of "minor character death" in this context, and the Dickens and Shakespeare twists (poor Molly!). the punchline made me laugh in an antisocial manner (I should have closed the window; it's late).
marysutherland
Jun. 23rd, 2011 09:17 pm (UTC)
I am starting to worry about the connections within my brain after coming up with this, since I managed to get from "Hey, 'bunny' is a word beginning with B" via Wallace and Gromit's were-rabbits and a recycled Twitter joke of mine to killing myself off again in only a few hours. Once again distracting me from all the other things I'm halfway through writing.
uwsannajane
Jun. 20th, 2011 03:22 am (UTC)
Laughing helplessly! V. well done.
2ndskin
Jun. 20th, 2011 12:45 pm (UTC)
squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. metafic makes me happy. oh . . . but also very sorry to hear of your (alleged) gruesome demise. I trust we'll find out it's all an illusion in the next installment.
marysutherland
Jun. 23rd, 2011 09:11 pm (UTC)
I am rapidly running out of ways to explain my persistent failure to die, so I think I had better stop killing myself off again for a while. It also shows a worrying exhibitionist tendency, I feel. BTW I have now realised that my full alias should, of course, be "Mary Sue Sutherland".
2ndskin
Jun. 24th, 2011 08:27 pm (UTC)
clearly, you're just a very persistent zombie. Mary Sue . . . *teehee* combined with Sherlockian exhibitionism that's quite a potent mix.
warriorbot
Dec. 23rd, 2011 11:34 am (UTC)
I missed this it the time! *hops* *squees* I totally imagine that that's the way you'll go. Death by plotbunny is my new headcannon for you!
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )